Why I fell for games

The earliest memory I have of playing a video game was when I was in the 6th standard – losing my pocket money of 1 rupee, which was after I saved two weeks’ allowance of 50 paise each – in a video game center on Mario in the very first round. I lost and it left a very sour taste in my mouth, because Mario was supposed to be easier game in the market and I couldn’t crack even that. I was dejected. There was no way I could play Contra (the one I wanted to play). I vowed never to play video games again. I didn’t have enough money to lose. This was in the ‘arcade’ era. Home consoles were unheard of. At least in India. But, two years later when my cousin from the US handed down his Game Boy (B&W) as he moved on to GBA Color I became an instant celebrity. The only game I had was ‘Kirby’s Dreamland‘. I remember playing it countless times till the day my father decided to get rid of it and sold it for a pittance. I was not even aware. It was the first heartbreak I had to deal with. I moved on, with memories in my heart. Every handheld I see today reminds me of that.

Somewhere hence, I gave up on video games. Near the end of my graduation when I could afford a computer, I did try a few computer games, but somehow PC gaming didn’t appeal to me. I preferred a dedicated gaming console. I was hesitant to buy one, as I doubted if my father would get rid of it by the time I come home from college. So, when the PSP was released I wanted in. I bought the PSP two years after its release. I loved gaming on this handheld. Though, I found the controls inefficient, I felt it held only a little of what a home console could offer. I amassed a library of PSP games. Loved a few but hated many. It was a financial disaster. By then, I realized gaming was an expensive hobby. But, I wanted more and better games, so had to chose carefully. After weeks of gazing at shop windows and trying the demos here & there I decided to make the plunge – I bought a PS3. I’ve never regretted the decision.

I’ve been gaming since 4 years & ‘ve played my share of games. My friends ask me why I game? Why I didn’t find it childish? If I’m addicted? They say I should ‘get a life’. What should I tell them?

Would they understand if I say it is just awesome to interact with a world, seeing the consequences of your actions? That it’s like books and movies with an element of interactivity? Will they ever know how it feels roaming in the underwater city of Rapture, losing oneself in its streets, amazed at the vision of Andrew Ryan – lauding his guts in creating a Ayn Randian value based city – and feeling sad how unbridled reason – without moral guidance – wreaked chaos in the city; fighting big daddies & splicers to save the little sisters to give them a good life. That game is indeed an example of what our society could become if we get carried away forgetting to balance reason and morality. Will they understand games like Bioshock have blurred the line between interactive entertainment and art? Will they understand that I not only have seen ‘western’ movies, but, ‘ve lived as a cowboy in ‘Red Dead Redemption‘? That I broke horses, saved people, hunted for game, treasures & bounties, took part in a train robberies, helped a revolution, and the freedom when I just took my horse and wandered aimlessly in the rocky terrains of Mexico, plains of Kansas & dusty roads of Texas, camping at night and watching the stars. Will they know the beauty of Renaissance Italy, the joy in climbing major historical monuments in Florence, Venice & Rome, the beautiful vistas I could see from that height, the thrill in sneaky assassination attempts and cinematic chases, exploring caves & catacombs for hidden treasures, using prostitutes & thieves to distract guards? Will they know how it feels like a medieval assassin? How to tell them I went on adventures like Indiana Jones in Uncharted as Nathan Drake climbing the Himalayas in search of Shangrila, walking the Ruba’ al Khali desert in search of the Iram of Pillars and escaping an island full of mutants? Will they ever know the joy of creating an character, upgrading it, customizing it all through the game, approaching missions the way I want to, completely ignoring the main plot and just wandering off, and literally living in the game world of Skyrim? Will they know the tension, loneliness, dread & hopelessness I faced walking the streets & subways of New York facing chimera in Resistance? They’ll never. Will they know the joy of hunting for loot and bigger and better guns in the search of vaults and immeasurable treasures on the lands of Pandora in Borderlands? No, they will not. I can’t explain these to them and so ‘don’t. I just ignore them and game.

Gaming has given me memories I’ll cherish for a very long time and ‘m very glad for the time I got to spend in these virtual worlds. I dedicate this post to all the gamers out there.