Dear Sai,
I know you are going through the lowest point in your life, that you are clueless and want a guiding hand, a sympathetic smile and someone to believe in you. Let me tell you what, you did not get all of them, but you still made it through. Ten years hence you’ll look back and term this period as the most difficult but life changing time. Hang-in there. Life teaches us everyday, sometimes the same lesson again and again till we learn from the experience. Over the last ten years I’ve stumbled and learnt lessons that would’ve made your life less difficult and more bearable, had I known them earlier. But, better late than never. Here are a list of few points to help you navigate the world better. Hope to see you as a better me.
Life:
- There’ll always be a difference between the life you lead and the life you want to lead.
- Become tough. The world is not a nice place to live-in. Remember what Rocky said, “The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it.”
- Kindness is often considered a weakness. Learn to be rude and to fight. You need not inculcate these into your character, but if people fight (which they eventually will), you can repay them in kind.
- Good doesn’t always win, the worthy don’t always get. Understand that.
- Develop a thick skin. You’ll get hurt again and again. You cannot survive if you are sensitive. You need a tougher hide.
- You can get through life only if you have discipline. Always try to do what is right over what is easy and tempting.
- Life happens one day at a time. So does the good or bad it brings with it. Have patience.
- Don’t try to live your entire life in one day. Progress in life as in career is made over time, not overnight. Have patience.
- Some problems cannot be solved. If you keep waiting for shit to disappear in life to enjoy it, you’ll never get the chance.
- Stop focusing on how the world should be and learn from how the world is.
Money:
- Don’t believe people who say ‘money will not solve all the problems under the sun’. They really haven’t slept hungry or been to a government hospital.
- Spend less. You’ll be surprised to see how many things you thought were necessary but actually aren’t.
- Don’t let people spend on you, it’ll give them moral rights over you.
- Financial independence is necessary for peace.
Relationships:
- Love as a feeling only, is a juvenile concept. For it to work in life, love requires work, patience and strength of character.
- There can never be only one true love or a soul mate.
- Unconditional love is a myth. You only get if you give.
- Life is a lonely path. No matter how strong your relationships are, they’ll let you down or come in your way at one time or the other. If you are sure in your heart and have a clear conscience, march on.
- Many a times your family and friends will be the biggest detractors.
- Learn negotiation skills. These will be the most used skills in your entire life, be it in agreeing to a common ground with your spouse, or salary with your boss.
Power:
- Information is wealth. Always be on the know.
- Read, read and read. Read for entertainment, for knowledge, for peace. Reading is the only way to learn without experiencing.
- Reading builds your intuition, your gut feeling, thereby increasing your skill.
- Build confidence by repeatedly doing things you are uncomfortable handling.
- People judge a book by its cover. Learn to present yourself well. Skill alone will not work.
I’ll send you another letter in a few years time.
Love,
Sai
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