Experience shapes life. We are who we are, not just because of what we can do, but also of what we cannot do and the lessons we learnt along the way. The lessons we learn colour the glasses with which we see the world. Though we wouldn’t have chosen those circumstances if it were upto us, it is only through them we would’ve learnt some lessons that serves us today. Some lessons that I learnt the hard way but have been useful to me:
- When you put in a lot of effort, you expect results. But, sometimes, you won’t see any. You won’t succeed every time you work hard. You will always need to put in more than what you can get out of (anything) – be it in work or in relationships and sometimes even be prepared to get nothing.
- When you face apathy, indifference & condescension and have no option but to swallow it, you’ll learn to control your ego, learn to deal with hurt and to push on inspite of that, not because you can, but because you have no other choice but to move forward and getting out of the situation is more important than your feelings.
- Some are friends in good times. Some step back when we need them most. True, adversity reveals our friends. But, sometimes everyone lets you down. The folks you count on most will abandon you, probably not out of choice, but there’ll not be there when you need them. When faced with such scenarios you learn to do things on your own and that life is ultimately a lonely path and that you need to build the wherewithal to survive on your own.
- You don’t like being made fun of because of your limitations, you wish people were more friendly, you wish people were more understanding and kind towards you and so by default you’ll try to listen more, understand more and be kind to others. You’ll constantly think if you are a burden to others or if you are hurting them and tailor your behaviour/personality to cause others as less pain as possible. This way you’ll learn substituting your own desires to others’ and learn empathy.
- We’ll do whatever it takes to survive when the chips are down. It’s not immoral, just survival instincts. You know what you can do & will do to survive and wish people stopped judging you from a high pedestal. So, you’ll also do the same – stop judging others.
- When buying new stuff or replacing old stuff frequently, is not an option, you’ll learn to take care of your stuff. You’ll take precautions to store them well to maximise its life. You extend the same courtesy while dealing with others’ stuff.
- You don’t need ‘much’ to be happy. When you have less, you enjoy what you have more. Also, having less frees you.
- You understand the transient nature of wealth. You didn’t have it yesterday. You have it today. Who knows if you’ll have it tomorrow or not? So, you don’t let your confidence come from ‘how much you have’ but from ‘what you are when you have nothing – character’.